‘Twas the Night Before Christmas!


Time for some humor – with apologies to Clement Moore & Democrats.

 ‘Twas the Night Before Christmas!

1    ‘Twas the night before Christmas, when all thro’ the land,

2   Not a Senator was stirring, nor lifting a hand;

3   The Deficits were hung by the Capitol with care,

4   In hopes that Obama & Congress soon would be there;

5   The Democrats were nestled all snug in their beds,

6   While visions of Taxes danc’d in their heads,

7   And Mama in her ‘kerchief, and I in my cap,

8   Had just settled down for a long winter’s nap.

9   When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,

10   I sprang from my bed to see what was the matter.

11   Away to the window I flew like a flash,

12  Tore open the shutters, and threw up the sash.

13  The moon on the breast of the new fallen snow,

14  Gave the lustre of mid-day to Dependents below;

15  When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,

16  But a minature sleigh, and eight Union Reindeer,

17  With the President driving, so lively and quick,

18  I knew in a moment it must be a trick.

19  More rapid than eagles his Advocates they came,

20   And he whistled, and shouted, and call’d them by name:

21    “Now! AFL, now! NLRB, now! SEIU, and CIOs,

22   “On! Teachers, on! Teamsters, on! Alinsky and Soros;

23   “To the top of the Fiscal Cliff! to the top of the wall!

24   “Now trash it all! Trash it all ! Trash away all!”

25    As dead leaves before the wild Deficits fly,

26    When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky;

27    So up to the Cliff-top the coursers they flew,

28    With the sleigh full of Hand-outs – and Big Unions too:

29    And then in a twinkling, I heard on the roof

30   The gnashing and grinding of each little tooth.

31    As I drew in my head, and was turning around,

32   Down the chimney Obama came with a bound:

33   He was dress’d all in loans, from his head to his foot,

34   And his commitments were all tarnish’d with ashes and soot;

35    A bundle of Food Stamps was hung on his back,

36    And he look’d like a beggar just opening his pack:

37    His Obligations – how multiplied! His Deficits – how crippling,

38    His cheeks were like roses, his fingers were rippling;

39    His droll little mouth was drawn up in a grin,

40    As he contemplated hitting the “Rich” on the chin;

41     The bill for a Tax Hike he held tight in his teeth,

42    And his joy encircled his head like a wreath.

43    He had a thin face, and a little flat belly

44    That shook when he laugh’d, like a bowl full of jelly:

45    He was skinny and happy, a right socialist old elf,

46    And I cringed when I saw him in spite of myself;

47    A squint of his eye and a twist of his head,

48    Soon gave me to know I had something to dread.

49    He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,

50    And emptied all the stockings; then turn’d with a jerk,

51    And laying his finger aside of his nose,

52    And grasping the Wealth, up the chimney he rose.

53    He sprung to his sleigh, to his team gave a toot,

54    And away they all flew, after taking the loot:

55    But I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight-

56    Thanks for your votes, and to all a good night!

Seriously, Merry Christmas & Happy New Year to everyone! All the best for 2013!

The Old Guy PhD

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